


Requisitions

by wintermute



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: 55 gallon drum of lube, Humor, M/M, Poor Jasper, Tumblr Fic, i don't know where this came from
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-21
Updated: 2013-09-21
Packaged: 2017-12-27 04:47:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/974510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wintermute/pseuds/wintermute
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>"You want to explain this?" Phil held out the folder to Clint, who turned to lean against Phil's desk, right next to his chair. Their thighs brushed against each other, sending a warm shiver up Phil's body.</i>
</p><p><i>Clint grinned, flipping through the papers. "I actually have a legitimate use for that."</i><br/> </p><p>In which Clint fills out a requisition form for something... unusual.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Requisitions

**Author's Note:**

> This is what happens when class got boring and you hang out on Tumblr instead.
> 
> Inspired by [this](http://thisiswintermute.tumblr.com/post/61787105463/ralkana-lovelynobody00-tin-pan-ali) (thank you, Ralkana, darling, for reblogging that and brightening my afternoon). Yes, it really exists.  
>  
> 
> ETA: unbeta'd. I'm slowly combing through to make sure I caught everything...

“Agent Coulson, sir?”

Phil looked up at the nervous junior agent standing at the door of his office, an eyebrow crooked in question. “Yes, Agent Morales?”

“Uh, it’s about the requisition form Agent Barton filed last week.” Morales seemed to shrink further into himself as he spoke.

“What about it?” Phil had to work hard to not sigh. He’d been stuck in DC the previous week attending a series of meetings regarding national security (he secretly thought it was Fury’s punishment for him dying on everyone), and he’d yet to have time to properly review everything that had happened with the Avengers. While Clint had assured him that nothing major had happened, Phil knew that Clint’s definition of “something major” was... not the same as most normal people’s definition.

Morales swallowed thickly before placing the thin folder onto Phil’s desk. “I think it’s better if you see for yourself.”

Phil picked up the folder and flipped open the cover. The corner of his mouth twitched in what Clint called his not-smirk.

“I’ll talk to Agent Barton about this,” Phil said, finally. “Is there anything else?” Morales shook his head. “Good. You’re dismissed.”

Phil’s not-smirk grew into an exasperated smile as Morales high-tailed out of his office. He leaned back into his chair. “Having fun?” he commented off-handedly, still looking at the folder.

A rustle of fabric and soft thud later, Clint landed behind him from the vents above, dusting himself off. He shrugged.

“You want to explain this?” Phil held out the folder to Clint, who turned to lean against Phil’s desk, right next to his chair. Their thighs brushed against each other, sending a warm shiver up Phil’s body.

Clint grinned, flipping through the papers. “I actually have a legitimate use for that.”

“You have a legitimate use for a fifty-five gallon drum of lube.” Phil deadpanned.

“Of course!” Clint’s grin grew wider. “And you can blame Hill for that. She asked me to run some expert level hand to hand training for the junior agents since Natasha’s on that op-I-shouldn’t-know-about. What better practice than wrestling in lube?”

Phil rolled his eyes. “Only you would think of that.”

“Oh, come on, Phil,” Clint drawled as he pushed himself off the desk, turning Phil around in his chair and slotting one knee between his legs. He pulled at Phil’s tie and pressed in. “It’ll be fun.”

“Hmm.” Phil hummed, his lips pulled into an actual smirk as his hands found their way to his lover’s hips. “Fun, huh?”

“Uh-huh,” Clint murmured in a low voice, leaning in until his breaths ghosted over the pulse point behind Phil’s ear. “I might even jump in and give them some demonstrations.” Clint’s lips brushed against the sensitive skin of Phil’s neck as he spoke . Phil swallowed down a whine at the feel of moist skin and his fingers tightened over Clint’s hips, his thumb rubbing against the stripe of exposed skin between his t-shirt and cargo pants.

Clint moaned softly at his touch. “What do you say?”

“Hmm, I don’t know,” Phil said half-heartedly, his fingers digging under Clint’s waistband. “My decision making is currently being compromised by sexual seduction.”

“I’m a spy. Seduction is a valid technique to achieve an objective.” Clint climbed onto the chair, straddling Phil’s legs. His body melded to Phil’s as he wound his arms around Phil’s neck, his hips grinding down. Not for the first time, Phil thanked his foresight to buy the oversized computer chair.

They’d only seen each other in passing for the last few days with Phil trying to catch up on all the urgent paperwork he’d missed while in DC and Clint stuck in his post mission debrief, and Phil missed his lover more than he thought he could. However, as much as he wanted to throw Clint down on his desk and have his wicked way with him, they were at work and he might bend his own rules about sex in the office, he drew the line at actually breaking them. The flustered scream following the opening of his office door only served to reinforce that thought.

“Jesus Christ, Barton!” Sitwell squealed as he covered his eyes with the paperwork in his hands. “I did _not_ need to see that!”

“Your own fault for not knocking,” Clint snapped back as he climbed off Phil’s chair, a shit-eating grin plastered on his face, which was still slightly flushed with arousal. “Also, you scream like a girl.”

“Barton,” Phil said, reaching to pat him on the thigh. “What do you need, Jasper?”

“I was going to see if you want to go grab some coffee, but I can see you’re busy with... other things.” Sitwell gestured at Clint, then turned on his heels. “I’ll come back later.”

“Go away, Sitwell,” Clint shooed, watching Sitwell close the door before turning back to Phil and sighing. “As much as I want to continue this, I have an appointment with Garcia down at the range.”

Phil hummed, standing up and bringing Clint towards him. “I know,” he said, pulling Clint into a soft kiss. “God I missed you.”

“Me too,” Clint whispered against his lips. “The apartment feels empty without you there.”

“Wanna get some Thai tonight and veg on the couch with a movie?”

“I’m game if you actually get out of work on time,” Clint said with a knowing look.

“Come hell or high water,” Phil promised. “I’m ditching everything and leaving on time whether I get it done or not.”

“Who are you and what have you done with my Phil?” Clint grinned as he nipped at Phil’s bottom lip.

“I’m taking a page out of Banner’s playbook.” Phil shrugged.

Clint laughed.

“So what about my requisition form?”

“If you can convince Hill, I’ll sign off on it.”

And if the smirk on Clint’s face was any indication, Phil had a feeling he was going to hear from Hill very soon.

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr: thisiswintermute.tumblr.com


End file.
